It’s October now. That means that I have officially been writing blogs for a year now. October 10 is the date that I received a phone call from my oldest sister that my dear, sweet, wonderful father had died. I was away at a conference in Minnesota when I received the call. I was born in Minnesota and, despite always wanting to visit, it was actually the only time I had ever been in the state. I remember the moment well. I was actually numb from the call as I really thought it would be my mother-in-law, not my father, who would die first. Surely, Lynn was not calling about my dad.
To me, my father was larger than life! I always described him as a gregarious, outgoing, fun loving, joke telling type person…and he was. I was always so proud that he was my father! He would enter a room and instantly connect with everyone in the room. He would go through a drive-in at the bank and call the teller by name. He literally lit up the independent living section of Sunnyside as he happily strolled to the dining hall chatting with every single person he passed. Yes, I was so proud of how he lived his life! He exercised and walked every single day. So, he was a “young” 89…except his heart. His ticker eventually had given out but his pacemaker had added 10 extra vibrant years to his terrific life!
To me, my father was larger than life! I always described him as a gregarious, outgoing, fun loving, joke telling type person…and he was. I was always so proud that he was my father! He would enter a room and instantly connect with everyone in the room. He would go through a drive-in at the bank and call the teller by name. He literally lit up the independent living section of Sunnyside as he happily strolled to the dining hall chatting with every single person he passed. Yes, I was so proud of how he lived his life! He exercised and walked every single day. So, he was a “young” 89…except his heart. His ticker eventually had given out but his pacemaker had added 10 extra vibrant years to his terrific life!
Some may already know this but my father loved sailing. Love of the water was something we had in common, although I prefer for my boat to have a motor. Not him! He loved sharing stories about how he would take his dates out on his catamaran to enjoy a moonlight sail. Yes, he was a lover! He loved life and he loved every person that he met along the road of life. We also have that in common so my website and counseling business has a nautical theme. He also loved nature! As a landscape architect, he designed some of Virginia’s most loved campgrounds and parks in the George Washington National Forest, such as the Crabtree Falls hiking area.
I had an opportunity to speak at his “celebration of life” service. Much thanks to all my siblings and loved ones for letting me talk. Anybody who knows me well knows that, just like my father, I am not shy to speak in public. I was eager to share my version of his life story with others. He never wanted a grim funeral and I was determined to carry out his final wish. My father was a Christian man and I can still feel his spirit in my life to this day!
It was a beautiful service that ended with some light moments of some family and friends listening to my talented nephew’s girlfriend extraordinary piano playing after guests had left the church. I had been comforted by our original pastor, old church friends, childhood friends, work colleagues and a host of characters that I had met all throughout my life. That’s the nice part about a funeral – you actually get to see all the people who love you and have participated in your life all in one place at one time. Thanks again for offering up your love and support.
A year later I now have a label for that moment in time – a quantum moment. Another dear soul who I admired and recently passed away, Dr. Wayne Dyer - the “father of motivation,” coined the term. A quantum moment is one of those dramatic periods of your life that changes how you view things forever. It changes you. Beyond grieving, it is a life changing event that you will always acknowledge. Do you know the quantum moments in your life?
Now, I would imagine that most of us would consider a parent dying as a quantum moment. For me, it propelled me to pursue my life’s quest with even more vigor and zest! Life is so precious. If my energetic father could suddenly die then life seemed so temporary. Yes, we all already know life is temporary but it struck a chord so deep in my soul that I became desperate to fulfill my life’s work…so, I have been writing and helping people ever since.
My father always wanted me to write. He always encouraged me to share the stories and tips that I would use in individual counseling sessions with the public at large. “You are a great helper in this world”…he would tell me…”learn to share your stories with others”. So I am doing that now and I hope that my writing might resonate with at least one soul occasionally as it comes from the depth of my heart.
So tonight I am writing during the middle of a big storm with historic flooding potential. As a self-professed “weather junkie”, I awoke to the sound of pouring rain from the impending hurricane. I turned on the weather channel to get a quick update on the status and noticed the October date. So, it just struck me – an entire year has already passed since my father’s death. Wow!
This article is not meant to be about death…actually, quite the opposite…it is about life! My wish is that you are using your time wisely and are living a wonderful and authentic life. I hope you are savoring the precious moments with your loved ones and friends and not being distracted by the routine pattern of life. The normal routine can easily fool you into thinking that you have forever to do whatever you set out to accomplish in life. So, I hope by sharing my story that some of you may value your time more. Life, even when it is difficult, is such a precious gift. Each day is a blessing. Practice gratitude, hug your loved ones, challenge yourself and work towards your goals. Start living your best life today!
This article is not meant to be about death…actually, quite the opposite…it is about life! My wish is that you are using your time wisely and are living a wonderful and authentic life. I hope you are savoring the precious moments with your loved ones and friends and not being distracted by the routine pattern of life. The normal routine can easily fool you into thinking that you have forever to do whatever you set out to accomplish in life. So, I hope by sharing my story that some of you may value your time more. Life, even when it is difficult, is such a precious gift. Each day is a blessing. Practice gratitude, hug your loved ones, challenge yourself and work towards your goals. Start living your best life today!